This material is part of a Field Guide profile on the Jehovah's Witnesses.
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Personal from the Field Guide Webauthor
Those who have family or friends involved in the JWs are often very concerned about their loved one's welfare if they are enmeshed in the JW organization. Such involvement usually puts a great strain on the relationship, as the JW becomes more and more involved in JW activities and pulls further and further away from fellowship with any "unbelievers." The temptation is great to try to pry them loose. But please note the following observations before attempting such a project.
- Trying to “argue doctrine” with a dedicated Jehovah’s Witness is usually a losing battle. By the time they are seriously committed to the organization, they have pat answers for almost any biblical issue you can bring up. And the organization’s "reasoning" methods are so convoluted that normal logic doesn’t apply.
- One of the doctrines that they inculcate very early in any convert is absolute, unquestioning loyalty to the organizational leadership, unquestioning agreement with its teachings, and unquestioning obedience to its policies. This makes it even more difficult to discuss any Biblical matter. Just as a Roman Catholic may defer to the Pope, the Witness will defer to their Headquarters leadership whenever they are confused about a Bible passage.
- Many, many Jehovah’s Witnesses have left that organization… or been kicked out… in recent years, as there has been considerable internal turmoil at the top of the leadership. These conditions then trickled down to the more local leadership, and then to the average lay Witness. In most cases, these people did not start down the path to exiting the group because of doctrinal questions, but rather because they began to have doubts about some of the horrible fruit of some of the policies of the group.
- A few years ago, it was very difficult for a doubting Witness to get any support
from others, as there is a system of spying within the organization. Any doubts expressed,
even to a close personal friend in the congregation, would usually be reported to
the local leadership, and could result in suspension or expulsion. Because the dedicated
Witness believes that the organization has the only path to salvation, the idea of
disfellowshipment can be terrifying.
Thus even if they were beginning to have serious doubts about some matters, most Witnesses would put them out of their minds out of fear of retribution. With the advent of the Internet, this situation has changed somewhat. There are, around the world, a number of groups of former Witnesses dedicated specifically to helping people get free from the organization. They have websites and anonymous discussion forums, where "doubters" can go to get accurate information and help in sorting through their questions–without revealing their identity. - It is helpful for family and friends to know at least a bit about the history and
doctrines and policies of the group so that they can know what they are up against
if they wish to intervene in any way with their loved one’s choice to be involved
with the Witnesses. You can do this by reading the rest of the material in this Field
Guide about the Jws, starting with the Overview, and taking advantage of the many
weblinks and books mentioned at the end of that Overview.
The only effective practical method I have seen for having any chance of affecting the dedication of someone involved in the Witness organization is to very gently nurture any areas of even slight doubt that the Witness may express. Not by addressing them head-on, but by carefully and casually encouraging the person to talk about them. - Keeping the lines of communication open with a friend or relative who has begun studying
with the Witnesses or who has joined the group is difficult. The policies of the
group encourage estrangement from family and non-
Witness friends and immersing oneself in an endless round of meetings and door- every opportunity of interaction with the Witness is as positive and supportive and loving as possible. Mocking their beliefs, arguing about doctrine, or complaining about the fact that they have little time for friends and family any more will only lead them to concluding that they are being "persecuted for righteousness’ sake."to- door witnessing. The really dedicated Witness can spend almost all free time involved in these activities.
Therefore it is vital to see that - Love is, in the end, the only answer for this situation. Love the Witness unconditionally, express that love openly. And don’t be drawn into hostile discussions that go nowhere and only end up convincing them in their own mind that you don’t love Jehovah God and you don’t love them.
At the link below is documentation on one of the reasons many Witnesses eventually
left the organization. They came to see that it did not have the evidence necessary
to back up its claims to be God’s mouthpiece on earth. You may find this material
of help to use with your loved one. HOWEVER–I am not suggesting that you give this
article to your loved one unsolicited by him or her at this point in time. I am quite
sure that would only alienate them.
If a Witness is beginning to have doubts already,
and is open to input, this sort of information can be devastating to their faith
in the organization. But to the Witness who is new and enthusiastic in their faith,
it would just be tossed aside as lies without even being read. Witnesses are warned
against ever reading "dissident literature", and ordered to not even look at it.
I would suggest instead that you read it over, and file it someplace where you can find it if you are ever given an opportunity in the future to use it. And then pray that God give you the wisdom to know when and how to use this and any other information that you may acquire about the Witnesses. And also pray that He give you the patience and peace of mind to keep the doors of your heart and home open to your loved one. In spite of this painful and in many ways irrational choice they are making.
Witnessing to Jehovah’s Witnesses
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Helping Free Loved Ones from
Jehovah’s Witnesses
Suggestions for dealing with friends or family members who are, or are on their way to becoming, affiliated with the Jehovah's Witnesses.